Heartless Witch

I am often nicknamed as a "Heartless Witch" by those who are well-acquainted with me and you would probably agree on this too if you were to know me personally. Growing up, I have always preferred non-fictional novels over fiction writing and opted for mostly the depressing ones because I never believed in all that YA bull romance. What these authors don't realise is how high they get these teenage girls' hopes and expectations up in a relationship and it sickened me because don't these people know that expectations will only lead to disappointment? 
 

Well okay, it sure is fine to have a little faith in happy endings but reality check, life doesn't work that way. Every time someone tells me something cheesy and romantic I would just shake the whole idea off and say "Nothing lasts forever" and leave them crushed. I'm sorry, but it's the truth and I can't help being honest.

However heartless I may be, I have to admit that I can be quite sensitive. Yes, people are genuinely surprised to find out that I actually do have feelings – my brother especially *rolls eyes*. Having said so, I always feel the need to express my thoughts and ideas – especially when I'm passionate about something.

One thing you should know about me is that I do like to please others and as simple as this sounds, it's not easy for me. I can be very compassionate and when someone needs me, I will be more than willing to give the shirt off my back to offer help in any form. It sure is tough to make a choice I don't want to make but there comes a time when enough is enough. I have been in many situations where I was sacrificing more than I could afford and I got hurt and it sucked.

I then accepted the fact that I can't make everyone happy and I learnt to put myself first for a change, and say no. Also, it is a-okay to be a little selfish and to follow your own heart in order to...heal. But this doesn't change the fact that maybe deep down inside I still can't simply just abandon someone in need of my help though.

Of course, I'll take extra precaution from now on and I intend to carry on with my defenses up just because I have been taken advantage of in the past under similar circumstances. Yes, I know I should stop worrying about someone hurting me or disappointing me intentionally but I just can't risk getting my heart broken again. 

Sigh... Do you see the importance of being heartless yet?